is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize