I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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