i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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