His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
