i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
When did angry sex become our thing?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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