So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
