Dual....:-)
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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