So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
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Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
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Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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