Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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