i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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