Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize