I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I touched a dick in church today
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