If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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