I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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