HIV tests are more positive than that guy
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
