How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
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