yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
