Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
