I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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