oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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