Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize