two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i just google imaged poop.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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