it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize
