Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
