Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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