can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I just found puke in my bra..
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
