She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
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