i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
