Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

Fine. I'll sleep in my office

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(845): View more from New York

Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence

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(507): View more from Minnesota

2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird

(504): View more from Louisiana

Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.

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