real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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