2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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