Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
