And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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