try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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