I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I FOUND THE LEGS
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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