would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
