Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
