Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
