We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
