Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
