I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize