Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize
