there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
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He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
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Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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