Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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