Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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