i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
