You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
