she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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