If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
