Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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