My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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